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Heroes Community > Tavern of the Rising Sun > Thread: Capitalism for Dummies
Thread: Capitalism for Dummies This thread is 2 pages long: 1 2 · «PREV
Svarog
Svarog


Honorable
Supreme Hero
statue-loving necrophiliac
posted April 22, 2004 02:48 AM

Quote:
Them be some fat heifer's you got there....where might the bull be?

Uh... inside?!
____________
The meek shall inherit the earth, but NOT its mineral rights.

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terje_the_ma...
terje_the_mad_wizard


Responsible
Supreme Hero
Disciple of Herodotus
posted June 10, 2004 02:04 PM

Hey, I got a good quote my sister gave me:

"War is capitalism with the gloves off."
- Tom Stoppard.

Anyone who knows who that is?

(And yes, we're both socialists. We are the Red Menace! )
____________
"Sometimes I think everyone's just pretending to be brave, and none of us really are. Maybe pretending to be brave is how you get brave, I don't know."
- Grenn, A Storm of Swords.

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Aquaman333
Aquaman333


Famous Hero
of the seven seas
posted June 11, 2004 10:04 PM

Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Socialism: You have 2 cows. Wait, no, you don't. The government has 2 cows. You have none. You are poor. WAAAH!

But you still get to drink the milk from them.


I made another one:

HC capitalism: You have two cows. One is called Aquaman, the other's called Marelt_Ekiran.


Them be some fat heifer's you got there....where might the bull be?


Since we're getting personal...

Aquaman Capitalism: Aquaman enjoys the spoils of the greatest economic system to date and laughs from his penthouse as the Socialists scramble around in chaos, desperatley attempting to get their unproven system to work.
____________
"Brian, look! There's a message in my Alphabits! It says,    
"OOOOOOO!"."  
"Peter, those are Cheerios."-Family Guy

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Svarog
Svarog


Honorable
Supreme Hero
statue-loving necrophiliac
posted June 12, 2004 01:42 AM

Excuse me. You're gonna have to delete that post. This is a thread for funny posts only.
Just wait till you see the Revolution coming.
____________
The meek shall inherit the earth, but NOT its mineral rights.

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Marelt_Ekiran
Marelt_Ekiran


Promising
Famous Hero
Watcher of All
posted June 12, 2004 07:15 AM

Oh, don't worry. We will fortify ourselves in the penthouse when that happens. This will result in the following sequence:

The workers will then take over, but this will quickly result in a fight as to who is going to lead the charge against the penthouse. There is a lot of money inside there, and everybody is going to want it to "share" it amongst their brother (aka, stuffing your own pockets).

Hence, several leaders will arise amongst the scum, and they will start to argue amongst each other about who exactly will be in charge. In the meantime, no one is going to do anything, because there isn't anyone who tells them to do anything. People are naturally lazy, after all, and the glory of socialism tells that their brothers will "share" with them.

Eventually, the leaders will settle down in some form of a equivalent of a "Soviet". Everyone who does not agree with the choices of leadership inside the Soviet is going to be shot by their own comrades. Eventually, this will get people going, just in a far more miserable way than they ever did under the capitalist system.

The leader of the Soviet will then order the production of war machines, in order to storm the penthouse, where we (the capitalists) are still feasting on our large storages of caviar and champagne. In order to accomplish this, the workers and peasants will have to abandon their former duties, and hence, nothing usefull will be produced. What follows is a lack of food and many of the proletariate starve to death. The remainder continues to build war machines, but at 2% efficiency, because of empty stomachs.

The Soviet will start draining money from their comrades, in order to finance this waste of effort at building a war machine. Since the people who are building the war machine will get payed anyway, they won't do a thing. Hence, the 2% efficiency rate. But eventually, they will finish some product, which does not really function, since it was build by uneducated peasants.

The war machine will be dragged through the streets, in order to storm the penthouse. However, because of it's crappy design, it will collapse half-way. The leader of the Soviet will order everyone involved shot, and shoots the rest of the Soviet, just because he thinks they are out to get him.

This leads to civil unrest, and the leader of the Soviet will eventually be killed by the angry mobs, who are starving and now see the fruit of their labours fall apart in the middle of the street. There will be severe chaos and no leader will really arise, since they would all get eliminated at once. The peasants and workers will then proceed to beat each other up with clubs and pitchforks.

After everyone is out of energy, will to fight and means of fighting, we (the capitalists) will then decend from the penthouse and send everyone back to their factories and farms to actually produce stuff, make a living and profit from the rewards of hard work and the advance of technology that capitalism funds.

The end.
____________
Perception is everything.

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Svarog
Svarog


Honorable
Supreme Hero
statue-loving necrophiliac
posted June 13, 2004 01:52 AM

A nice analysis you've done there, buddy, but you forget one tiny thing. When our revolution comes the capitalists will be the first to go. So I don't think you'll make it to the penthouse, (which will be nationalized btw, like everything else) because you'll be... how shall I put this... exterminated.
____________
The meek shall inherit the earth, but NOT its mineral rights.

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Trogdor
Trogdor


Legendary Hero
Words in a custom title
posted June 14, 2004 08:53 AM

i saw this before on another forum.
____________
"Through the power of the dollar you can communicate with the dead." - Artu

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Celfious
Celfious


Promising
Legendary Hero
From earth
posted June 14, 2004 10:16 AM

I have to say.. there are different forms of view. One is, capitolisim, is governed by man made law. It enables man to screw another. Be legalities, men can screw eachother over. I mean finanialy, not sexualy.

Capitolism for dummies- The law gooverend ability, which enables people to **** eachother over, aslong as it stays within the legal system.

CC's, can charge you 4 times what you spent. That is 400%. As a matter of fact, they can charge you unlimited dollar amounts, theres no cap set. I am gonna use my gamble trick, settle outside the US. probably russia man!! And hope the world keeps turnin'.. I have russian friends.. LoL in russia!!
____________
What are you up to

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rechet
rechet


Hired Hero
posted June 15, 2004 06:54 PM

Why do you need to buy a cow if all you need is one liter of milk?
____________
--
Jukka Mikkonen a.k.a Sir Rechet

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Asmodean
Asmodean


Responsible
Supreme Hero
Heroine at the weekend.
posted December 15, 2004 08:21 AM

Been looking for this for a while. Revived and +QP
____________

To err is human, to arr is pirate.

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Marelt_Ekiran
Marelt_Ekiran


Promising
Famous Hero
Watcher of All
posted December 16, 2004 01:11 AM

Why did only the socialist get a QP for this? The capitalist side put some hard work in this as well.
____________
Perception is everything.

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Consis
Consis


Honorable
Legendary Hero
Of Ruby
posted March 24, 2005 08:12 PM

This One For You Svarog

I've been meaning to post this for a long time but I didn't want to because I knew it would support your claims against Capitalism Svarog. But the more I think about the greater good, the more I realise that no matter how I try to rationalize it, it is simply wrong. There's no way around it. But this is the kind of country I live in. It isn't perfect and I have no idea how to fix it. It might never be fixed for all I know. So I might as well say what I'm going to say and you can have your laughs at my capitalistic society. This is one time you will be justified in doing so.

A long time ago, when I was in the AirForce, my job was search & rescue helicopters. I didn't pilot them; I flew as part of a rescue crew aboard the UH-60's. It's actually a military aircraft which means it's bigger, stronger, more reliable, and more cost efficient than civilian aircraft. If you've ever seen MASH or Vietnam movies then you're probably thinking of the wrong helicopter. Those helicopters are smaller, lighter, and less expensive than the 60's. They are what the military calls "Hueys". THe helicopter I flew in is identical to the those used in the movie "BlackHawk Down". Here's a link to show what they look like:
http://www.army-technology.com/projects/black_hawk/
But there is a huge difference between the UH-60's I flew in and the UH-60 BlackHawks of today. If you look at the BlackHawk versions of the 60's you'll notice it has miniature wings for carrying missiles. It also has a highly advanced and classified onboard technology that is kept a guarded secret by the military. In short, the new ones are extremely expensive and the new designs give it an offensive capability. The 60's I flew in have no offensive capability; only defense(dual M-60 sideguns as main fire suppressors). My bird was only geared for rescue.

That's where I come to the point. I was a rescue medic flying UH-60's for the AirForce. I was stationed at an airforce base called Nellis which is located slightly outside of Las Vegas, Nevada. I'm sure you've heard of the American Vegas. It's an international gambling hotspot. The city has everything ranging from the Hoover Dam to Red Rock canyon(outdoor recreation/climbing) to a massive man-made Lake Mead. It even has Mount Charleston for extra hiking and such. The city is huge and massive and they see a lot of accidents from vacationers to local residents. But one thing this very large city does not have is adequate rescue personnel. This is especially true for any sort of rescue involving extreme climes and distance. This is a major setback considering all the distant recreational locations. I don't know the reason why they don't but the simple fact is they don't. And they know this well. They know it so well that the city's civilian-run rescue flyers have actually drawn up a contract giving them legal rights to be the first ones to respond to any and all emergencies. If a rock-climber gets stuck, a boat starts sinking, a rock slide occurs, etc the military cannot simply fly out to rescue the people involved. The differences between the military and civilians are significant. The military monitors all radio channels, is on call 24 hours a day, has faster and more reliable aircraft, equipment, and trained personnel. In fact most emergencies involve the Airforce receiving the distress call and being legally forced to direct it to the civilian authorities.

I remember one call that some climbers were stuck on a mountain side. They had radioed over the CB system(same kind that truckers used). Our Tower got the call and relayed it to us rescuers. We were out of our barracks, suited up, and sitting on the flightline waiting for takeoff within 15 minutes. I remember we had to sit there and make the call to civilian authorities if it was ok if we could go look for the callers. But we were told they had an available "bubble-chopper" that could do the job. It made me sick. My Sarge and I sat and waited until we received another call that they needed extra help from us to cover more area. So we finally got the ok from the civilians to fly around and help look. We never found anyone.

It's all about money over here. I can say that with a good degree of certainty. The whole problem with military getting out and rescuing people before the civilians do is: when that happens less money is allocated to those civilian rescue organizations. The reasoning is that since the military is doing the job, then they don't need to waste time and money on the more expensive civilian employees and equipment. Because of this kind of thinking, which is wholly capitalistic and irrational, the civilians went to court and forced the AirForce to sign a contract saying that they must defer all rescue calls to civilian response teams before taking any action. It became law and now anyone who is hurt or dying and needs help must wait for the less capable civilians to save them. And it's all because of funding.

Now laugh Svarog. I know you want to. I won't stop you. I would agree that this is ludicrous capitalism at its finest.
____________
Roses Are RedAnd So Am I

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Svarog
Svarog


Honorable
Supreme Hero
statue-loving necrophiliac
posted March 25, 2005 01:16 AM

Ahahahahahahaha! Ahahaha!
____________
The meek shall inherit the earth, but NOT its mineral rights.

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