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| Thread: New GAME: --> Make D&D characters for your handles! =) |  This thread is pages long: 1 10 ... 17 18 19 20 21 ... 30 · «PREV / NEXT» |
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RedSoxFan3
Admirable
Legendary Hero
Fan of Red Sox
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posted September 26, 2002 07:49 PM |
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*The party buries Nidhgrin in the center of the room and prays for their lost friend
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Go Red Sox!
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Odvin
Promising
Famous Hero
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posted September 26, 2002 08:06 PM |
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<Just keeping the thread at the top of the list against Malice's posts>
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Shadow_Elf
Wandering Thief
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posted September 27, 2002 01:43 PM |
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Bjorn190
Responsible
Supreme Hero
Jebus maker
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posted September 27, 2002 02:13 PM |
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*Bjorn190 feels tired and wants to sleep*
*casts sanctuary spell*
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RedSoxFan3
Admirable
Legendary Hero
Fan of Red Sox
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posted September 27, 2002 07:10 PM |
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The party wakes up a few hours later. It is quiet. The room is still empty. The party prays once more for their lost friend and descends further into the cave.
They walk through a narrow tunnel for nearly an hour. They come to a wide canyon several hundred meter wide. There is a small stone bridge that twists and turns its way up and down left and right. The party reluctantly ventures across. They get 80-100 meters on to the bridge when they see a large shadow cast on them getting larger and larger. The party looks up and sees a giant gang-green hand.
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Go Red Sox!
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madmartigan
Bad-mannered
Famous Hero
who will never walk alone
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posted September 27, 2002 09:41 PM |
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The giant hisses and talks to them:
*Who be you are?"
Madmartigan steps front and introduces himself and the party:
"I am Madmartigan. This is Bjorn, a cleric. These mages are RedSoxFan, Athimus, and Klauts. And that elfling at the back is Shadow_Elf. We mean no evil. We are just passing by"
Giant:
"This be my bridge. You pass it, you pay for it"
Mad:
"Okay, what is the price?"
Giant:
"Me not want gold. Me wants good time. Me wants to laugh. Make me laugh, you shall be allowed to pass. Me not laugh I throw you down"
Mad: (thinks a bit and starts to tell a joke)
"George Bush is dead and he will go to hell. One of the servants of hell meets him at the gate: "Welcome to the Hell Bush. You will stay here for a while, however, this place is very crowded. Therefore, we will replace with one of the ppl here, and send him/her to the heaven. You will suffer his penalty. We give you the right to choose whom you will replace"
The servant take Bush to a room. In the room, there is Osama Bin Laden. He is carrying a huge rock, and he is wearing a belt of fire. The servant asks: "You want to replace him and suffer his punishment?" Bush replies: "nah, he is the last person who deserves to go to heaven. Let him stay here forever."
The servant takes Bush to another room. In this one there is Saddam. He is sitting in a boiling couldron, and a monster is whipping Saddam. The servant asks: "Shall we send him to heaven? Do you accept to suffer his punishment?" Bush replies: "you kidding me? I would suffer any punishment, but I cannot accept sending Saddam to heaven"
The servant takes him to another room. In this room, there is Clinton. He is sitting in a very comfortable armchair. In one hand he holds a cigar, on the other a glass of whisky. In front him, there is Monica Lewinsky, giving Clinton a *....job* (oral sex ). The servant asks: "You want to replace this one". Bush smiles: "I would not accept normally. He was my rival in politics. But I guess he is okay to go to heaven. I accept to suffer his punishment"
The servant grins devilishly and speaks: "MONICA, get ready. You are going to Heaven"
(Mad finishes his story looking into the face of the giant. The giant smiles but doesn't laugh)
Giant:
"That was a good one. But not enuf to make me laugh. Tell another one"
Mad: (to the party) well, that was my best. Does any of you think he can make him laugh?
...
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Shadow_Elf
Wandering Thief
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posted September 27, 2002 10:19 PM |
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heres a joke but it only works if u drink this stuff cuz it lets u see the funny pictures im gonna make
* hands dumb thing a glass of green water *
* giant drinks it falls asleep and falls into the river *
man y coudnt u have stuck around to see the knife annd the heart and the throat
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Dont mess with the best cuz u aint got no contest.
Forget the rulz they were made to be broken
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tuapui
Famous Hero
Poetic Psycho Baby BlackDragon
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posted September 27, 2002 10:36 PM |
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The little dragon pokes his head out of Bjorn's donut bag. He looks around and then at the giant. Confused, and in a state of half hunger and sleepiness, he asks if he could tell a joke, though due to circumstances it would also mean cheering up the party prior to the loss of Nidhgrin. However the Dragon is not too intelligent, and will try its best.
"George Bush was invited to Osama bin Laden's secret hideout for peace negotiation. He sat down at Osama's Chair, and in front of him was Osama, and on his table was three red buttons.
Osama said, "Bush! I'm glad we could have this meeting! How are you?..."
Bush replied with his greetings, and continued to press on with his peace talks. However, when he was about to begin, Osama pressed the first button and a pail of urine fell on Bush' head. Osama laughed and Laughed, but because it was a peace negotiation, Bush was passive. He could not do anything. So he continued to talk with urine all over him, and midway into his speech Osama pressed the second button. A glove extended from a hole in the wall and punched Bush in his left cheek. Bush had almost had enough, but it was not his turf. So, he continued his peace talks again, and when he was done, Osama pressed the third button. The chair sprung upwards and hit the ceiling, together with Bush. Bush hit the ceiling and fell back down, Osama rolling on the floor laughing his head off. But Osama stood up and shook Bush's hand, and said he would consider.
After a month, Bush invited Osama to go to the white house to complete the peace talks and sign an agreement. Osama did not want to go, but had no choice since Bush knew where his hideout is now. So he went to the white house, and sat down at George Bush's desk. On his Desk were also 3 buttons. Osama was shocked, but he thought, "So he try to play same trick on me! I never fall for trick. He will have no fun!~".. After a while of waiting and planning his move, Bush came in and sat down. "Sorry im late", he said. And then he set his breifcase on the table and sat down. Osama was wary of his actions and prepared for anything. After a while of discussion, Bush pressed the first button. Osama jumped and hid in the corner of the room, but nothing happened, so he cautiously went back to sit down. Then midway in the speech Bush pressed the second button. Osama again ran to the corner of the room and this time was more frightened, because he thought that Bush was doing something to him that he didn't know of, like radiation or something. But he sorted things out and came to sit down again. When Bush was wrapping things up, he pressed the third button. This time there was a huge bang and crash, and Osama screamed and peed in his pants, but then nothing happened, in fact actually it was a cat that has knocked over a dustbin. So he was furious at Bush for making him pee in his pants, and retorted," What was that for? At least my pratical jokes were more substantial."
Bush replied, "What? Those buttons were to launch A-bombs targeted at Afghanistan."
The Giant looked at the little dragon with his head poking out of the bag, and said, "Heard that one before, next!"
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 <<<Hy
peractive  Do not touch.
Highly Psychotically Poetic.
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tuapui
Famous Hero
Poetic Psycho Baby BlackDragon
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posted September 27, 2002 10:39 PM |
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dang shadow HAD to post his right before mine....no matter i post it anyway
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<<<Hy
peractive Do not touch.
Highly Psychotically Poetic.
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bjorn190
Responsible
Supreme Hero
Jebus maker
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posted September 28, 2002 12:18 AM |
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*The giant is in the river, his face is above the water so heīs just sleeping. Heīs blocking off the river, and you see a secret passage on the river bed. Something shimmers inside... *
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Shadow_Elf
Wandering Thief
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posted September 28, 2002 01:10 AM |
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we decide to go into the secret passage
strange high pitched voice : we must cautch those ragtag adventurers before they find the jade monkey
second strange high pitched voice : or before big king flamer (( hes a dragon but we find out later )) finds out we havent got them
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tuapui
Famous Hero
Poetic Psycho Baby BlackDragon
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posted September 28, 2002 01:22 AM |
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"Sharp eye Bjorn" ,comments Martigan.
"You can see secret passages, guess its not so secret anymore" ,RedSoxFan added.
"I AM THE GAME OWNERE!!!!" ,exclaims Bjorn angrily.
"So whatta we do, there IS something shiny in there...shiny things usually mean gold in our pocket." ,suggests ShadowElf.
"I think...we should eat the giant" ,remarks tuapui.
"I think me and Arthimus will sit and sip tea while you people go and check it out" ,klauts thinks.
"I agree" , agrees Arthimus.
Meanwhile the dragon whipped out a fork and knife from Bjorn's bag and starts poking the giant's flesh and removing a big chunk of his ass.
I feel pretty damn mad today, i think im going insane...
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<<<Hy
peractive Do not touch.
Highly Psychotically Poetic.
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Shadow_Elf
Wandering Thief
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posted September 28, 2002 01:25 AM |
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a i posted first
b
shadow elf : fool dont eat the giant well get flooded !!!!!
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Bjorn190
Responsible
Supreme Hero
Jebus maker
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posted September 28, 2002 01:41 AM |
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*LALAAAA*
Everyone is now level 5, except athimus who is still level 6.
Shadow elf is also level 6, and he has a poison dagger since before. His backstab now does more damage.
Tupai the magic dragon is also level 6, and his firey breath is stronger and can be used more often.
Madmartigan is enhanced from killing the black knight and has a 10% chance per round of getting an extra attack, doing maximum damage (ability name: Holy Rage).
Everyones spells are stronger.
Bjorn190: "Letīs find out whatīs in here.."
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Shadow_Elf
Wandering Thief
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posted September 28, 2002 01:46 AM |
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Quote:
we decide to go into the secret passage
strange high pitched voice : we must cautch those ragtag adventurers before they find the jade monkey
second strange high pitched voice : or before big king flamer (( hes a dragon but we find out later )) finds out we havent got them
what about my post?
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Shadow_Elf
Wandering Thief
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posted September 28, 2002 01:54 AM |
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but if i keep my level 6 nm
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tuapui
Famous Hero
Poetic Psycho Baby BlackDragon
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posted September 28, 2002 05:56 AM |
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"magi....MAGIC Dragon?? I am by the way RESISTANT if not IMMUNE! to magic! You calling ME a magic dragon?! ME? a black dragon that is MAGIC??" ,little black dragon goes hysterical, flying all over the place and scorching anything that can be scorched. "WHY I AM UTTERLY INSULTED! I ...."
Meanwhile Shadowelf decided to poke his head in the secret chamber and peer around. Suddenly, a hand reached out and grabbed him into the chamber, and it all happened so noiselessly that nobody noticed until..
"Where is that elf?" ,asked Martigan.
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<<<Hy
peractive Do not touch.
Highly Psychotically Poetic.
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bjorn190
Responsible
Supreme Hero
Jebus maker
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posted September 28, 2002 09:57 AM |
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~Inside the secret passage you find a cave, and some crazy goblins that talk about "big king flamer", but you see that they are just talking about some sort of wooden toy. They see you, and get scared and run and hide behind a chair: "AAHHHH PEOPLE!! :/ ". You also see a chest that shimmers.. looks kinda dangerous.~
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Shadow_Elf
Wandering Thief
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posted September 28, 2002 02:57 PM |
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* slashes at his captor 8 damage and poison *
* poison 2 damage *
* goblin kicks 5 damage *
slash critical hit 16 damage and he dies *
* shadow elf limps out of the chamber slightly wounded in the leg *
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madmartigan
Bad-mannered
Famous Hero
who will never walk alone
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posted September 29, 2002 12:42 AM |
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holds Shadow_Elf before he kills the last goblin.
*Stop!!! You idiot. Are you planning to kill all the resource for information?*
Grabs the goblin and raises him, they look at each other in the eye. The goblin is afraid to death.
Mad: "What's inside this chest?"
Goblin: "Me dont know. We dont open. Open tries it we, die us. Trap is death chest"
Mad: "I think he is tying to say that the chest is trapped" (no chit??? ) "What do you know about these caves?"
Goblin: "Me dont go inside caves. Ge deep in caves we, die us. Dangerous is caves. Stays us here, big king flamer us protect."
Madmartigan throws away the goblin. *Bah, he is no use to us. He will provide no information. (to shadow_elf: ) Kill him if you want to.*
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